Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Green mimosas i think yes
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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