hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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