Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
