i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
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