Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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