I am in a vortex of obligation.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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