You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
