I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Randomize
