Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
