the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
