I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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