White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
