We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
