This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Randomize
