Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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