By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
