Taylor Swift is so right about you.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
