Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
