found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
