A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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