woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Randomize
