he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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