worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
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