FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I checked into jail on foursquare
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
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