who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
