How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
This house was built for laser tag.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
