do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
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