I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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