god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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