I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
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