Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
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