I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
