You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
