Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I believe in your delicious
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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