I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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