They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
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