I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize