You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
