The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
