Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
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