He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
