I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
