i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
