No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
