He asked to "fluff my boner.."
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
