and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
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if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
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I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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