Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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