Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
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found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
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What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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