I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
