I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
